Parashat Devarim opens with the verse:
"אֵלֶּה הַדְּבָרִים אֲשֶׁר דִּבֶּר מֹשֶׁה..."
“These are the words that Moshe spoke…”
As Rashi explains, these were words of rebuke. Moshe reminded Bnei Yisrael of the places where they had sinned during their journey in the desert. Yet rather than directly pointing a finger, Moshe alluded to their mistakes by simply naming the locations — letting them understand on their own.

This teaches us a powerful principle: rebuke doesn’t have to be harsh or humiliating to be effective. When it comes from a place of love, respect, and sensitivity, it is far more likely to be received and internalized.

But there is an additional layer worth noticing. The Torah emphasizes where these words were spoken:
"בְּעֵבֶר הַיַּרְדֵּן"
“On the far side of the Jordan”
In other words, Moshe didn’t deliver this message in the midst of their desert wandering or moments of failure. He waited until the nation had reached a more stable and secure place — after victories and conquests, just before entering the Land of Israel.

Why then?

Because the Torah is teaching us an essential lesson: timing matters.
If you want someone to truly listen — wait until their heart is open. Not in a moment of stress or vulnerability, but when they are calm, confident, and ready to hear.

This applies to us in every relationship — as parents, partners, friends, and leaders.
Even if we are right, even if what we have to say is important — the when is just as important as the what. Words said at the wrong time can hurt, but words said at the right time can heal and uplift.

Let us learn from Moshe Rabbeinu not only what to say, but how and when to say it.

Shabbat Shalom — may our words be thoughtful, our timing wise, and our hearts open to one another